Instructions
1. Do the following WITHOUT complaint.
2. Choose 5 people to do this after you completed yours.
3. Leave a tag on the person's tagboard to say he/she have been tagged.
4. Start your post with; I have been tagged!

Favourites
Favourite Color: Don't have one. Why settle for one?
Favourite Food: Hmm, chocolate?
Favourite Movie: 10 Things I Hate About You - original and JARLZ version
Favourite Sport: Netball
Favourite Day of the Week: Sunday
Favourite Season: Spring
Favourite Ice Cream: That cookie dough thing. :)

Currents
Current Mood: Exasperated
Current Clothes: PJs
Current Desktop: Reignite picture
Current Time: 0125
Current Surroundings: Living Room, very messy.
Current Annoyances: Headache, school, O lvls, school. Haha
Current Thoughts: I wanna fly. Fly me to the moon anyone?

Firsts
First Best Friend: Javine Kiew
First Crush: Victor something. From kindergarten. He was our class monitor and my partner. :)
First Movie: Cinderella I guess. Can't imagine not having disney movies as a part of childhood.
First Lie: err..
First Music: Lemon Tree by Fool's Garden I think.

Lasts
Last Drink: Some chocolate soy shake thing that's supposed to give me a boost of energy!
Last Car Ride: Home from tuition
Last Crush: Don't tell you. nehneh.
Last Phone Call: To mummy dearest
Last CD Played: RK's latest.

Have You Ever...?
Have you ever dated one of your best friend: Like, always!
Have you ever broken the law: Yes, if you consider underage drinking a law. LOL. Parental consent though!
Have you ever been arrested: Nope.
Have you ever been on TV: Yeah. But my new TV is too slim for me to be on it. No more of that I guess.
Have you ever kissed someone you dont know: No mistletoes in Singapore!

Random 5 things you are good at:
- Talking rubbish
- Making people smile
- Gracefully accepting being called an aunty
- Saving money.
- Writing lovely letters that melts hearts :)

4 things you've done today:
- Overslept and missed my stop on the way home
- Ate leftover pizzas which tasted as good. (BTW, try eating frozen pizzas. It is quite good. Really!)
- Ran my thumb over my clown nail
- Annoyed Andrew on facebook.

3 things you can hear right now:
- My mummy's voice.
- My sister's brushes whooshing against the drawing block.
- Some cricket-y insect noise

5 People to tag:
(with blogs)
Do it if you will. :)


I'm tired. Real tired. I secretly have eyebags, and wonder if people see them. I'm wishing for a getaway, or maybe an e-learning week would do me good. But no. BAHHHHHHH-bie dolls are for kids with no life. :)
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How you go online and blog-hop and find people in relationships questioning the relationship they are in. One moment they sound soooo blissful and the next its like hell. (Not that I read everyday but you kinda get the picture once you read a few posts.) And most of the time its the girl's perspective. So common. Girls always blog about love love love (MOST anyway). As for the minority of guys who blog, they tend to blog more seriously, tackling serious, controversial issues.

And we wonder why people take girls lightly. SHEESH.

Okay I have no idea what the above post was meant for.

I have been dreaming many weird dreams recently. Many nightmares, just that I don't get scared anymore.

In one, it was very religious. Like a movie almost, about someone's life (not mine so I really don't know why I dreamt it) and the Christian influences in her (I think its a her) life. One scene I remember is of this Christian education class in school. And the same scene appeared again in blood red and white. Flashing. It's like the chorus of the movie. Every once in a while there's this image of Christ on the cross, those really scary images they put on documentaries flashing red and white, together with the day's event or something. Confusing I know. Somehow dreams just click in your mind. Words don't do them justice at all.

And then I dreamt that I was one of many orphans (I think) and then they left me in this weird place. Some evil man tried to sell me to those brothels. But I ran away. And then I came back to this place where a nice woman took me in and I pretended to be another person, only to realise in the end that the woman was like the boss of the evil man. And she knew it was me all along. =x

So weird. All my dreams are so complicated and makes no sense.

And I dreamt that I gave some random secret of Zoe's away and she became so angry with me. I don't remember the details of this one but I remember the feeling of looking at her face dawning with bitter realisation of my betrayal.

And I dreamt of Gary and his girlfriend. About her blog and his blog or something. Remember James' question on whether we dream in colour or BnW? I dream colour. I remember dawne's blogskin was shades of pink and purple. Random? VERY.

Oh oh! Yesterday's! I dreamt that the clouds in the sky fell down to earth while myself and some group were on a ship. BUT it wasn't a cloud in the end, it only looked like it was a cloud. I think it was some iceberg that melted and collapsed. It was quite exciting. Those adventure dreams where you're running and running and looking for people while running. Exhilarating.

Ah dreams. Stop coming cos I need sleep! I don't like waking up only to want to sleep more to know what happens in my dream.

Then again, they do look pretty exciting. Maybe I should write a book on my dreams. Like Johnny Panic and the Bible of Dreams.
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School has started but I'm still in my holiday mood. Had headaches for the two consecutive days which really irritated me. But it's gone now. After I stuck my finger down my throat. Don't know why every time I get bad headaches I have to vomit it better.

Anyway, had our first Sports Media Marketing today. Was quite interesting, even though I wasn't really looking forward to it. I think it might be the most fun modules this sem. Our group project isn't just a project, it might be selected to be implemented by Team Singapore and we get to go to Beijing 08 for the Olympics. How cool is that. :)

I miss slacking. A little. I have a lot to do actually. Things like 'Deal or No Deal' for KIDS church, presents and more presents, and then the pile of schoolwork that slowly creeps into my list of to-dos. AND I'm freaking myself out now. =x Plus there's DREAM trip coming up real soon.

No fret Janine. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger!
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The past three days have been spent at kovan mcdonalds - more specifically, the long table right smack in the middle - cutting, pasting, drawing, chatting, eating, laughing, crying, thinking, wrecking our brains and sitting there till our butts hurt. All for dear Charlene who very much deserves every little bit of effort that has been put in and every single cent.

Second scrapbook I've done. Yes, recycled the idea, but I absolutely love scrapbooks. I promise I will cultivate a habit of scrapbooking once I get married and have kids. Imagine if your parents did a scrapbook of you, the first step you took, the first word you said, those rare moments where smiles are captured on camera and you just want to remember for the rest of your life. Cool right. I know. :)

Anyway, I don't think there's anything wrong with recycling ideas and making the same things for different people, because every hand made present is unique and different, filled and made with a similar yet different kind of love. Char's was really fun doing together with erns, tinee and belley. This 'Mission: Surprise Charlene' has definitely gotten us closer, and we probably know more about one another now, especially Ernest! He used to be that forever politically correct MR Nice Guy who would say the right things at the right time. My my, what an eye-opener boredom and tiredness can be. :)

As for the surprise, we brainstormed like crazy, coming up with things like locking her in the toilet, playing disgusting games that involves flour and dripping water from the tap, and even giving char sleeping pills that last for five minutes - if such a thing even exists! We were so afraid that she'd find out that we had a surprise in stall for her.

In the end, we used our drama as the platform for our surprise. She obviously did not expected it and cried the moment she saw what really was inside the box. (Tineee got all excited before Char and ended up tearing before the b'day girl)

I really was so excited the whole day. Making faces at everyone except char, mouthing "so exciting!" every 5 minutes, cos I really was that excited. Pacing around making sure that char doesn't pop out from nowhere and accidentally see the present.

Okay picture time! Always rare to find pictures on my blog so enjoy.




Erns and his maple syrup. It's like his muse o.O



Ernest gone insane. :)



Tineeee all diligent.



Tineee and her funky hairdo. Love it babe!





Oh the things tiredness does to you.



My booost of energy. It contained more foam than my syrupy goodness though.



Our artistic mess.



the beautiful birthday babe with the decoy.



The Present People. (and my horrible eyebags)

Lovely. Thank God we outwitted Charlene this once. Mission accomplished!
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Today is a good day.

Getting along with Charlene's present. We've spent quite a bit this time. The most expensive gift the present group has given so far. :)

Anyway, I just did the second most liberating thing today. I deleted a horrendously embarrassing part of my past. Okay, I was a little reluctant - torn between the whole "be proud of your journey; I'm not ashamed of my past" kind of notion and... well, plain embarrassment. After a second person after JARLZ laughed at me, I decided it would be over. Everytime I go back there it makes me sick. To think that now I detest that kind of 'style' of writing - if you would call it a style.

And it brings back unnecessary memories.

I've been thinking like I said in my previously. I've been thinking of things like love. What is love? And I mean it in the romantic sense. What makes it so powerful that it can turn the hardest of hearts? What is its source?

I don't understand how it can weaken the strongest person. I don't understand how someone starts loving another. I don't understand how love gets cultivated or suddenly 'appears'. And how do you choose a lover. Rely on your feelings? Think logically? How can one choose to love another person romantically.

No I did not fall out of love (wasn't in anyway), I was just thinking about things when I suddenly realised it's all so silly. Love is selfish. It is so selfish. Think about it. You pick who you want to love. Whether consciously or subconsciously, we go through a certain checklist in our mind. We compare suitors. The good, the bad; which bad is worse. Some people even think of last names. Which sounds better. Prospects. This is still the more acceptable one.

Some people decide to 'love' another because they are lonely and/or don't want to be without a lover. Peer pressure. Pride.

All selfish no?

Yes. The cynical side of me.

Don't worry. I'm still bubbly JANINE! Just don't think I'll fall into the arms of the next guy who says their heart palpitates for me.
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I have a lot on my mind. Like thoughts flowing here and there. But I'm too tired to blog. School's starting in a few days and I'm not exactly excited. Plus my elective isn't... Ah well.

Brainstorming w tineeee belley and erns is fun though. I laughed till my stomach ached.

Ooooooh well.

Funny how I sound like I'm emo here. I'm really happy. Minus school. Minus elective.
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I got my Gilmore Girls Season 5 btw. :) Thanks so much Christine and Ernest! Hope it didn't burn too big a hole in your wallets. :x I love their presentation. So creative! They made a VCR out of tissue box and decorated it very nice with paper buttons. And Gilmore fits in nicely!

And I got a HUGE card from Ernest! Its envelope was the 'screen' for the VCR according to Ernest- I thought it looks more like a remote control. haha. But it's so prettyyyy. Black and pink and white. I would take a picture of it and post here, but I won't because I'm lazy. :) I reallllllyyyyy like it though. It's like the highlight of every present. Like what I told Belle, its really okay if I don't get a present. Just a simple card or letter would do cos I love reading them and they last longer than most presents anyway. And more often than not, they do contain a lot more lovin'. :)

I'm going to send my lappie to the hospital. SO will not be appearing here or on Facebook or MSN or friendster for these few days.

Facebook STILL freaks me out. I'm like clueless. 0.0
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Oh my.

I just decided to accept Azrael's invitation to facebook, since laaa said he got her hooked on it. And then I got lost. LOL. What's with the pokes and slayers and rabbits and what-nots?!

Had a good time at Botak Jones with JARL, we missed you Zoe! Shared with laaa a Botak burger (I think that's what it was called anyway) and was full already. The cheese fries weren't exceptionally good though. I guess the better ones you can get in Singapore. I miss Lonestar's cheese fries. I loved catching up. Minus the parts where laa and abriel gets carried away with talking about Chem or something. :) Quite sad that we're gonna have to give up our Tuesdays in a bit for the horrible friend-robbing A levels examination.

But I'm happy that we're gonna go sign up for driving together! Thank God. I have no idea what I have to do to learn driving and all, so I'm gonna let my best friends bring me and sign up and do whatever else we have to do. :)


Been running to compass on a regular basis and I'm loving it. Obviously a great time for my sister and I to chat normally, or even chat at all. We've covered many topics already - useless disgusting exes; songs that are suitable for lipdubs; friendship; and ice cream. Surprisingly, she does most of the talking. Reminisces the good old days and I just listen, nod and add a "why" here and an "ewww" there now and then. It has been eons since we have been able to talk like this. And it is a good start. Now, if only we can revise O's as we run. hmmmm.

My mother tried running with us yesterday. We refused to take the shortcut or turn here and go home already. I screamed at her everytime she started walking. She almost wanted to ask the ice cream uncle outside compass point if she can get 20 cents worth of traditional ice cream. Go figure.

Life is good. Then again, five seconds from now, I'll probably be eating my words. What to do!


Happy Birthday JORAMMMMMMMMMMM!
I.O.U :)
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The first time I've ever heard this sentence coming out from anyone's mouth. I really don't understand. When I was taking O's, everyone was busy studying, practicing papers after papers, meeting up with teachers to ask questions and all. I remember being afraid of wasting time. I made sure I used every single second to get something constructive done.

Now. I'm taking my O's a second time after 2 years have passed. I'm trying to refresh my memory on the formulas and things which I have not touched at all in the past 2 years. I'm pushing her to make full use of her time. Yet, she wants to start her O's next week. She is far from prepared. She is so easily satisfied. She has no idea what she wants in life.

I'm at wits' end.

O LORD. help me help her.
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RONALD! Haha you made my day man. Or rather, you made me made my own day. :)

Let's present the other readers with the scene.

I was at Kovan's Popular with my sister just before heading to church, looking for her Mathematics assessment book, to no avail. She decided to head over to the pens section and I browsed casually at the Primary 6 papers at the far end of the aisle. Some guy appeared at the next aisle and I saw him briefly at the corner of my sight.

I realised this guy was waving at me. I turned around, thinking - who on earth is this weirdo? At the back of my mind I was thinking its some guy who recognised the wrong person or something.

Then I saw him.

I realise I know him!

And then I did the most embarassing thing ever - I gasped super loudly. Like how a bimbo gasps at some horror movie when the ghosts get the victim. That kinda gasp. Like seriously loud. You can ask Ronald if you don't believe me.

Then I shut myself up and starting freaking out. "Omigoodness! What are you doing here! Omigoodness. That is just scary la!......" I can't remember what else I said, because really I was just saying it to cover up my embarrassment from that horrible loud unglam gasp. RONALD!!! WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was pretty funny though. I have no idea why I reacted like that. Seriously. I really freaked out at that moment. When I recognised that the strange weird guy waving at me was Ronald.

AHHHHHHHHH! Freaky. Ronald you freak me out!

But its a good freak out. Cos I'll forever be laughing everytime I think of my gasp. And your confused face. LOL.

It was nice to see you though. :) Like a quick short breath of the world outside that does not involve my sister.


On a different note, OP night was good tonight. It made me realise how tired I am. I didn't even realise it. Thank You Lord.

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I believe that there exists
A road for you and I
And if we dare, let's travel there
Before our spirits die .

I need to ask a question first
Because I wonder where
You'd like for me to walk once we
Start walking over there .

At first I could stay far behind
And trail from miles away
I'll keep away the pain that hopes
To follow you someday .

I will make sure the sun will set
With every day we use
Retrieving all of what you dropped
But didn't mean to lose .

I'll safe-keep all your memories
And let you walk along
Protecting you from harm and staying
Here where I belong .

Behind your steps my only fear
Is you won't be aware
That soon you may forget that I
Will still be walking there .

The path could soon be done and yet
I still proceed to yearn
For you to see me all this time
But you might never turn .

Because of what you find up front
You might not need to see
All of which is put aside
And done including me .

Maybe then we could begin
With me ahead of you
I'll clear the way of obstacles
and complications too .

I'll make sure your path is clean
And beautiful to walk
Paving roads of polished gold
And building walls of rock .

To keep you safe from all the fear
And worry in your mind
I'll fight the battles far ahead
While you relax behind .

To lead this way I must admit
You'll stare upon these floors .
And realize that this path you walk
Is never truly yours .

I cannot lead you on a road
Directing life to me
And keep you from experiencing
What is yours to see .

And what will come to be
Once the path begins to close
And you have never seen
What everyone else knows ?

You'll end in agony
With wonder as your thirst
I'll be the one to blame
For finishing it first .

And there I'll have to wait
Along the ending road
For you to soon catch up
And see my heavy load .

But if you never come
I never want to cast
My cares away and look
For you inside the past .

I cannot turn around
Against this one-way trail
By doing so I only show
My every try will fail .

So here we are back at the start
And still I must defend
The truth of how we truly want
Our journey here to end .

Take my hand and take a step
And let's enjoy this ride .
We'll take a road that's wide enough
For walking side by side .

We must make sure to not let go
Or fall behind or lead
For if I'm here and you are near
What else have I to need ?

Endure the rain and bear the pain
Together every day
As long as we will still remain
The rest will go away .

Firm your grip onto my hand
So I can help you climb
And if your back grows very tired
I'll carry you on mine .

No matter what the path may hold
I'll be with you right here
And if you know I'll stay with you
There's nothing left to fear .

Through every moment shared
I will never miss a smile
I'd only try to keep it there
And stare at it awhile .

Because you're walking closely
You will be so hard to miss
In cases where I'll be so bold
To try and sneak a kiss .

I will never let you be
Against your will, commanded
I'll never leave your side or let
Your hand be empty-handed .

Walk along and journey on
And with the end in sight
You'll know the only place where I can be
Is left or right .

And as this path comes to a close
I know that we'll be glad
We chose to walk the way we did
And live the life we had .

The road is done and you ask me
Where I will go from here
Yet still the only place for me
Is next to you my dear .

With Everlasting Sincerity,

Ryan

I've found a new blog to frequent. He was a contestant on So You Think You Can Dance but I never really followed much of that show. I found this beautiful poem on someone's blog and decided to go search his other works. And voila! Link's added.

I love how his thoughts flow beautifully and the rhymes don't come out forced.

I'd love to write like that.
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I really don't know how to start this post, so I'm going to use this excuse to start it so horribly. :)

I never should have waited till now to post this one, the excitement has died down a little, and I'm feeling a little emotional, a little reflective, a little apprehensive, and just a little pensive. Perhaps its the music I'm listening to - songs my dear laaa bluetoothed to me (our very first bluetooth exchange!) like Too Close For Comfort and Girl Next Door.

Then again, maybe not.

Eighteenth birthday. Supposed to be something big, significant, a milestone even; being 'legal', M18 movies, driving license and all. But it isn't all that big a deal really. To me maybe. I mean, I'm probably the last person who would run off clubbing because I'm eighteen now, or go buy alcoholic drinks because I can, even M18 movies are not a big attraction. The most fun thing about being eighteen probably is dangling all these possibilities and liberties (if you would consider them that) in the face of someone younger and eager.

My birthday this year wasn't an extravagant event. Not really if you compare it to those days when flocks of people would come over to our place and my mummy would cook all the good food, I'd wear a pretty dress, get my hair done and all. And the presents. I loved the books I used to receive from my dad's colleagues. But then again, I wouldn't want a huge party to celebrate my birthday anymore.

Tuesday, 250907. So far, the best surprise anyone has given me. The past few 'surprises' went really surprises, purely because I'm too sensitive for my own good and I sniffed out a rat. Or maybe its because of the poor acting skills. LOL. Anyway, the video was really, really shocking. Not shocking in the oh my goodness way, but shocking in the ooooh-amazing way. :) I've never really felt like a victim of surprises before, but this time it was killing me! I knew they were up to something, with the grins here and there, with Ronald running of to the toilet every 5 minutes. I was confused and it bugged me!

But I loved it. The ambience was close to perfect, with the purple silk-like curtains surrounding the small cosy section of IceCube. It was nice guys. :) And the ice cream Joel and Abriel had, SCRUMPTIOUS. Thanks you guys, it really made my day a thousand times - and counting. I still laugh when I watch the video. Zoe's 'OWWW' is just classic. I showed my sister earlier on, but she didn't understand what I was laughing at. TSK. Ignorance. 10 things isn't her kind of movie.

And the following will be 'thank yous' to you wonderful people in my life.

Joel: Amazing that you were part of this magnificent production and played a rather major role too! (actually you all played are playing major roles too) Thank you for flashing your abs so many times for the sake of the production. How very noble of you. :)

Abriel: For sacrificing your butt. Haha! No, he did not moon anyone in the video. Just had to allow Zoe to smack more than once. And for being a nice guy to chat with online. He always asks me about my 'guy situation', and tells me about his 'girl situation'. AND for his great acting skills. I can't believe I was actually all excited about spoiling the movie for him. 'DUNCHA ZOE DUNCHA!!!!'

Ronald: For giving up one day's pay and being the camera man, and learning video editing for the sake of giving me a nice present. Sorry your dentist has no luck. Haha.

Larissa: For laughing at the camera, for being the other 10 thinger, for being sooo silly.

Zoeeeeeee: Your sexy OWWWWW makes the video like 254313 times better. :)

I love you people. Thanks for taking time out of studying to do this for me!


As for the other cool people in my life...
My dad sent me a birthday card from Brunei. Not that I don't appreciate it, but have gotten quite used to it.
I wanted to get something for my mummy, but time and pride got the better of me. Oh well, next year or something, when I am more 懂事.
No thanks to my sissy. For not getting me anything.

My 小姑姑 bought me a genuine Juicy Couture bag. :) The second best present I received this year. She's like one of the hip aunts I have. Now I'd have another dilemma - whether to bring the bag out or not. If it rains or if someone spills something on my bag, I'll cry la (or maybe just get a serious case of heartache! Okay, that made me sound materialistic. :(

My mahmah and gonggong, kaiye and 大姑姑 for the angbaos. Not the biggest amount, but still contributes to my DREAM fund!

(I don't really know why I'm typing all these. Maybe it's cos I feel bad if I don't thank everyone who gave me something. Though they won't see this.)

GRACE! For your donuts. The first time I get a whole box of good donuts all to myself :) Of course, I shared it with my mummy and Zoe. Thanks my dear. Hope to meet up with you soon.

EQ for Five Scores and Seven Years Ago. :) Though the CD case cracked until very jialat. RK sounds a little different in this album though. More love songs, less 'Let It All Out' kind of songs. They covered 2 extremes in this album - a 12 second long song and another 11 min 5 sec song. Thanks EQ for your 'err.. card' too :)

Belle for your lovely crown-shaped card with the little photo collage. Thanks for putting in the effort to make it! :)

Chin for the cookies from gourmet carousel. It's good. And fat-inducing too. :x

Nicholas for the Ferrero Rocher. It's gonna last me like a few weeks. I'm like that with good chocolate and Famous Amos cookies. :)

Okay, I think that's it!

Oh wait, that's not all! I almost forgot the most important present. (Well not the most important, but the one I appreciate the most) Someone helped me with one third of the cost of my DREAM trip. She chose to remain anonymous so I can't thank her personally. But I'm really touched. I'm like struggling to get money from here and there to pay for the trip. Then there's also school fees at the back of my mind. Thank God for the blessing!

Well, thanks to all those who wished me too! Not going to name them ALL here. :)

I can't wait till the A's are over so that we can all go on the quest for our license.

Zoe! Your egg tarts are nice. The custard part can be improved, but I loveeee the crust. :) I so wanna go upstairs to chat with you and watch some movies or something, but I can't. My live revolves around my sister now. :(

Have you caught the water babies craze? Surprisingly, I caught it too! Brilliant gave me 4 water babies. I'm so intrigued by them. They're like little jellies. So coooool. :)

That's it. This post is over. Janine is one year older. Potentially another year wiser. Thank God for all the loves in my life. My prayer is that I'll be a blessing to all my loves around me as much as they have been to me. Oh one last thing. Did you notice the quote in the sidebar? It's true!
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I just looked back in my life, and realised what a mean person I was at that very moment. I don't know why I just thought of all this. Went back to the very source. It's still raw.

Things could have been different. I could have made difference.

I'm sorry. Heart in my hand kind of sorry.
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It's times like this, that I'm reminded why I go through all the trouble of getting something done, and done well. It's times like this that I remember the joy of bringing a smile to someone's face and knowing that it has touched their hearts.

For friends, all that is worth it. Late nights, long pull-hair hours of drawing silly sketches and frantically trying out with different markers. All worth it.

I'm really glad you liked it Ernest! Certainly was my pleasure planning it. You noticed we left out the microwave popcorns from the delivery report list - its cos Belle's bag almost ate the popcorn up! haha. :) As much as I am tempted to type some long-winded thing again, I shall refrain from doing so. Looking forward to getting to know you better in the coming years, go beneath the politically correct Ernest and find the 'BOM-fetti' one. LOL :)

Which reminds me, I have yet to invite Ernest to this supposedly exclusive readers private blog of mine. Sheeshhhh!
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